What to Say to a Girl on Tinder with 30+ Screenshot Examples

You’re about to discover a complete breakdown of what to say to a girl on Tinder.

From how to start the conversation right through to meeting up in real life.

Because we all know Tinder provides us with one GIGANTIC headache…

What the hell do you say to a complete stranger?!

It’s easy enough to get matches, but damn right tricky to turn those matches into a successful conversation.

There’s constructing the opener, keeping the conversation moving, and then ultimately, how you get a girl off of Tinder and into real life.

So if you’re stuck not knowing how to message a girl on Tinder, then this guide is for you. It’s a step-by-step breakdown of every stage in the storyline. You’ll discover how to:

  1. Profile your matches
  2. Send the perfect opening message
  3. Keep the conversation rolling
  4. Ask the girl out on a date / exchange numbers

And you’ll find 30+ screenshots of my personal Tinder interactions to show you the right and wrong ways to message your matches!

TRENDING: Discover 8 powerful messages that guarantee you a date on Tinder. Copy and Paste these 8 controversial messages on Tinder, Bumble and Hinge if you dare!

Now, I’ll assume you’ve already accumulated some matches, so let’s dive straight into Step 1…

1. Profiling your Matches

First things first, before you jump the gun and message a girl on Tinder, you’ve gotta take 30 short seconds to skim through her profile.

It’s the most overlooked step, and probably the most important.

Why? Because you can gain so much info from a bio, even just from a couple of generic selfies.

Not only does it help you to think up a specific opener, but it also enables you to suss out what type of girl you’re dealing with:

Is she the Vicar’s daughter type, a party girl, a selfie queen, or a batshit crazy psycho who has a tendency to key cars?

Basically by profiling your matches, you can gauge their personality, find common ground (if any), and work out a style of messaging that suits their persona.

Just like you wouldn’t ask a muslim chick out to wine tasting, or message a Harvard English Lit grad with sloppy spelling and grammar…

You want to speak to your target market in the right way.

What to say to a girl on tinder style of messaging

And just a 30 second scan of her bio is enough to build a character profile of your match.

So go full detective mode on her bio, pics, interests, and if you’re lucky… her Instagram photos.

Try and find something you have in common – places she’s visited, hobbies she’s into, food she likes etc.

Or failure to that, look for easy conversation starters, like any of these photos I’ve been spoon fed with:

what to say to a girl on tinder easy conversation starters

By doing this, you’ll be able to craft the perfect unique first message to grab her attention and get her excited to message you back.

Rather than messaging her like every other man and his dog starting with “hey”, “hey how are you?” or “Whats up”.

2. Sending the First Message

Once you’ve a good grasp of the type of girl you’ve matched with, it’s time to send the first message….

And don’t worry if your Tinder match falls into the elusive category – with just a single, generic picture and a blank canvas for her bio.

I’ll cover how to send ‘one-size-fits-all’ first messages too.

But first, let’s quickly cover the don’ts – first messages that will ensure a quick fire way to get you unmatched or ghosted.

Tinder First Message Don’ts

Avoid making any of these common mistakes when starting out what to say to a girl on Tinder:

Complimenting her Physical Appearance

Your match doesn’t need reminding how beautiful her smile is, or how gorgeous she looks in that bikini pic. The only kind of reply this warrants is “aww thanks”

It’s a bit cringeworthy and bordering on creepy. And shows you’re already putting her on a pedestal.

The fact you’ve swiped right is enough to show you dig her looks. No need to reinforce it.

Sending Boring, Generic Messages Like “Hey” or “Hi, how are you?”

Doing this will put you at risk of blending in with the hundreds of other guys messaging her.

Messaging a girl with “hey, how was your day?” ain’t gonna get her messaging you back in a hurry, unless your pics rival the likes of Brad Pitt or Ryan Gosling in the looks department.

This lazy man’s approach (strangely) does get the odd reply, however it fails to set up the conversation well. It’s pretty much doomed from the outset. Yawn…next.

Being Overtly Sexual

This one is pretty much a given. However it’s surprising how many guys get explicit right from the get go.

being too sexual with a girl on tinder

too sexual on tinder

Remember it’s a REAL person on the other end receiving your texts.

There’s only a 1% chance being overtly sexual and straight to the point might actually work for a first message…

…That’s when you’re returning home from an unsuccessful drunken night out, horny with blue balls, and message a girl on Tinder as a last resort before devouring a donor kebab.

And it just so happens your Tinder match is in a similar situation (minus the blue balls).

Tinder First Message Do’s

Ok so those are the Don’ts, now lets look at the Do’s for starting a conversation with a girl on Tinder.

VIDEO: If you want to get your Tinder match out on a date quickly, watch this:

(It’s the best way to get girls addicted to your messages on Tinder in the shortest space of time)

Personalized to Perfection

‘Stalking’ your matches bios, pics and Instagram accounts will help relieve the headache of not knowing what to say to a girl on Tinder.

Taking 30 seconds to browse her bio, will spoon feed you some solid material to use for an opening message.

And with this, you’ll stand out from the crowded pool of Tinder guys you’re in direct competition with by sending a unique message about one of her pics, or something written in her bio – hobbies, a quote, likes or dislikes etc.

Especially if you can find common ground.

The key with this is to be playful and fun with your personalised message. Don’t be like “Nice surf pic, is that Bondi beach?”

Despite being personalized, it’s still pretty dull, and almost as lame as starting with “Hey how are you?”.

Instead be more jokey, and challenge her:

“Strong photoshop skills with that surf pic…bet that isn’t actually you”

Lets look at some more personalized first message examples of some of my Tinder interactions:

First off, using a girl’s bio to form a solid opener:

how to start a conversation on tinder openers

starting a conversation on tinder example

Then there’s the really close detective work… Most people wouldn’t pick up on this.

(In the UK, Cider is very popular in the west country, it’s kind of a running joke)

personalised messages to send on tinder

personalised messages to send to a girl on tinder

And lastly, with this match, I didn’t have much to go on, but noticed a pic of her dancing in the kitchen. Her facial expression looked like she was in awe of something…

specific openers to send a girl on tinder

specific openers to send on tinder

Quick recap: Conduct a 30 second research of your matches bio and pics. If possible, tailor the opening message to something you find. And something that you feel is in the right style for her personality.

And don’t be boring with it. Be playful, funny or different. Try and make her FEEL something – happy, lol’ing, taken aback, bust her balls etc.

Naming the Name

Simply including your matches’ first name in a message will get you a high response rate. It subconsciously creates an emotional bond like you’ve known each other for years.

using the girls name for first tinder message

It’s a useful ploy if your matches’ profile is generic – you have nothing to work with.

A Whiff of GIF

If you’re really clutching at straws, and don’t know what to say to a girl on Tinder… try opening with a funny GIF

Studies show you’re 30% more likely to get a response by opening with a GIF, and conversations including GIFS last on average 2x longer.

Who would’ve thought hey? Welcome to the 21st century I guess.

using gifs on tinder

Starting a conversation with a GIF tends to work better with girls who appear to be embracing 2018 trends. Basically girls who have Snapchat dog filter pics, lots of selfies, and a worrying amount of emojis in their bio.

Same goes for emojis as openers. Look at her bio – if it’s littered with emojis, you can be damn sure a waving boy emoji will go down a treat to start the conversation off:

Evoke Emotion

You want to make her FEEL something!

It doesn’t matter what emotion you spark, just do anything to avoid sounding monotonic and lifeless. A good way to test this is to read the message back to yourself before sending it.

Basically try not to sound like a robot: “how-was-your-weekend?” Comprendez?

Shock her! confuse her…. bring a smile to her face, make her wonder about you. Anything like this and you’re almost guaranteed some kind of response.

Send something that grabs her attention, even something a bit out there and whacky works too:

messaging a girl on tinder by grabbing her attention

Emotion evoking first Tinder messages work best for generic profiles, when you’re struggling to think of something to send:

how to message a girl on tinder with emotion evoking texts

messaging a girl on tinder with emotion evoking texts

I Want to Play a Game

play a game on tinder

Kicking off with a game is a fun way to start the conversation.

And also a roundabout technique to get to know the girl you’ve matched with. Rather than asking dull questions like “Do you live in LA?”

Here are some fun example games to open with:

Snog, Marry, Avoid

snog marry avoid tinder opener

Would you Rather Questions

would you rather tinder opener

Asking your match unusual or thought provoking questions is another ‘easy in’ to force a reply if you’re struggling with what to say to a girl on tinder.

Good go-to topics with girls are spirituality and astrology:

spirituality first messages on tinder

So there are some tips for starting the conversation on Tinder. Now let’s look at how to keep the conversation going and push for the date!

3. Keeping the Conversation Moving

Different texting rules apply to Tinder compared with the traditional method of texting a girl you meet on a night out.

Certain bad texting habits are often overlooked with Tinder, to the point of actually playing to your advantage.

Messaging back straight away for example, (normally considered a big texting taboo) is counterintuitively a great tactic for keeping the conversation rolling on Tinder.

Why? Because Tinder is a fickle beast. Girls (and I’m sure boys too) have the attention span of a goldfish when it comes to messaging on the app.

So it’s imperative to strike while the iron is hot! Conversations on Tinder need to be fluid and fast paced if you want any chance of transitioning the conversation to Whatsapp or into a date.

Ideally you want to keep texting in the present until you close the deal (digits / set up a date). No waiting 3 hours to send the next message, or playing it cool and waiting it out a day or two.

Watch this video to learn exactly what Tinder messages you need to send to make a girl excited to meet up with you:

(With these 8 magic messages you will get girls inviting themselves over to your place for sex tonight)

The Conversational Don’ts

Let’s quickly cover the conversational no no’s to avoid when talking to your Tinder matches:

Bragging for a Shagging

Don’t brag, it just ain’t cool. The fact your match has swiped right for you is enough to assume attraction already. There’s no need to continuously sell yourself to impress her.

The whole point of the conversation is to get to know her, ask questions, and see if she’s worth meeting up with. NOT to stand on a podium shouting “pick me, pick me! I’m amazing!”

To be fair, Tinder does have a bad rep for people using the platform purely to seek validation. People like the feeling of being wanted, and the dopamine rush of getting a match is the only thing a lot of users are seeking. Not to actually use Tinder for it’s purpose – to go on dates and message matches! Be on the prowl for these attention whores and steer well clear to avoid wasting your time!

The Job Interview

what to say to a girl on tinder job interview

Avoid being Mr Serious and treating the interaction like an interview. Never ask questions like:

“What’s your favourite sport / hobby”
“Do you go out partying a lot?”
“Whats your favourite food?”
“Where do you see yourself in 5 years?”

Understandably, you want to get to know your match before asking her out on a date. But there’s a certain way to go about this without grilling her with 21 questions. More on how to do that in a sec…

Subject Sticking

The conversation might be going great, and your match might be LOLing or LMAO’ing about something funny you said. But don’t labour the point. Keep the conversation moving.

Here’s an example of subject sticking with a girl from Belarus:

avoid subject stick with a girl on tinder

What might work well there and then, might not necessarily have the same effect later down the line.

Now let’s look at the art of making good conversation on Tinder. Complete this stage well and she’ll be gagging for a date 😉

The Conversational Do’s

Think of your conversations on Tinder like a fast flowing river.

You want to follow the current, let it lead you down it’s path. Allow the conversation to naturally flow, progressively going further and deeper.

The moment you digress (suddenly change the topic), the river forks off and the flow of water becomes weaker, much like the conversation.

To keep the conversation fast paced, you need to be a good listener – pay close attention to what she writes, and pick up on something she says as material for what you say next.

The art of building rapport and forming a connection with a girl, is letting the conversation organically flow without stumbling blocks and U turns getting in the way.

Often bad conversations occur from being on a different wavelength (intellectually or creatively) or when theres a evident language /culture-banter barrier:

bad conversation on tinder

These kind of conversations often go nowhere unless you work out a style of messaging that suits their persona. Otherwise the conversation whittles down to a the flow of a baby boy pissing.

In comparison, here’s a conversation with an Aussie chick that leads to a date:

what to say to a girl on tinder good conversation

You know when you ‘click’ with a girl, and she’ll know too. Developing your conversational skills and knowing what to say to a girl on Tinder will help you make a connection with more of your matches. And it might even lead to them asking YOU out for a date! Like the example above.

‘Clicking’ is a prerequisite for asking a girl out. If you establish a strong connection and banter well, she’ll happily hand over her digits.

With that in mind, lets look at some tactics to keep the conversation fun, and flowing into destination click-land.

Playful and Funny

Keep the fun vibe alive past the first text.

A lot of guys open with a killer first message but fail to back it up with the same level of playfulness. They regress into dull chat, leaving the girl wondering ‘WTF happened to this cheeky fun loving guy?!’

If you come across serious and boring, your matches won’t wanna date you. How you message her is a reflection of what she’d imagine you to be like in person.

If you can’t think of something funny to say… don’t say anything at all!

“How about this weather hey?”
“Hopefully the rain stops soon”

A Tinder first date is intimidating and awkward enough as it is…so your matches are looking for a fun easy going guy who can take the pressure off.

Make sure you keep the conversation light hearted. Avoid asking serious questions, or going full blown Descartes on her ass:

“I think, therefore I am”

And try to avoid personal questions. Any mention of ex’s or bringing up your life struggles are big red flags!

A good way to dodge the boring bullet is to re-package a dull question to make it sound fun.

For example, rather than asking a girl what she does for work, instead spruce it up by playing the guessing game:

guessing game messaging on tinder


Mix up the dynamic with a fantasy scenario.

Role-playing is a great way to help your matches escape the mundanity of everyday life. If your match has a sense of humour, she’ll be eager to play along.

It’s a fail safe method to keep the conversation churning in a fun, informal way.

Here are some great role-play scanarios to experiment:

  1. Robbing a bank – you’re looking for an accomplice
  2. Getting married – you have the ring ready
  3. Meet the family / formal sit down dinner

role-play with a girl on tinder

Be the Challenge. Flip the Switch and Make HER Chase YOU

Reverse the power play. It’s something she won’t be expecting. Especially if she’s a 9 or a 10.

Give her a number of tests she must pass in order to be worthy of your time. She’ll start qualifying herself to you, like she’s needs to earn your approval.

what to say to a girl on Tinder by being the challenge

Also experiment using reverse psychology to get her chasing you. Pretend you wouldn’t be compatible and challenge her opinions.

Being the challenge will keep her hooked throughout the conversation. So have fun with it!


Pay close attention to how she replies, and pick up on something she mentions as material for your next text.

Eg. If you ask her what her spirit animal is, and she replies with lion. Rather than jumping the gun and telling her what your spirit animal is, like in this text:

listen to what she says

Instead, use ‘Lion’ as the subject of your next message to delve deeper into the conversation. Here are some examples of a good reply:

“Why a lion, do you like pouncing on your Tinder prey?”

“ohh you must be dangerous…I should tread lightly incase you eat me for lunch”

Or use a Lion King reference:

“Are you more of a Mufasa, Scar, or a Nala looking for her Simba?

Or “Maybe I can be Simba to your Nala”

Listening will ensure the conversation flows smoothly like the Amazonian river.

If the conversation is going well, it’s fast paced and you’re getting some clear signs she’s digging your advanced Tinder chat, it’s time to move to the final step…asking her out.

4. Asking a Girl Out on Tinder

A rough time frame to benchmark for asking a girl out on Tinder should be less than 24 hours after you send the first message.

A lot depends on the situation of course. But ideally you close the deal (get her digits / ask her out) within 5-20 messages back and forth.

And it’s best to do this within ‘one session’. i.e send the first message at 6pm and have the date confirmed in the planner before you go to sleep that very same night.

But when is the right time to ask her out?

You want to ask a girl out when her interest and investment level is peaking.

So think of your Tinder matches’ interest for a date like a reverted U graph:

interest for a date on tinder

Her interest will gradually climb from the first message you send to it’s peak (between 5-20 messages).

When her interest peaks, no matter what you say or how you phrase the date text, she’ll be shouting YES down her phone!

But if you miss the peak and fail to ask her out, her interest level will quickly nose dive to zero.

And it works both ways. If you ask her out on a date too early, before her interest peaks, you risk scaring her off.

So the secret is knowing how to tell when you’ve reached Everest Basecamp with a girl you’re messaging.

And to do this, you need to pick up on the cues she’s ready for you to pop the date question successfully.

VIDEO: It only takes 8 simple texts to get a girl from Tinder out on a date. Discover them here:

Signs Your Match is Ready to Say YES to a Date

Always assume the girl is into you. It’s better to be bullish on the date text rather than pussy footing around wondering whether or not she likes you, to then miss the boat altogether.

Holding a positive mindset will help keep you from second guessing your judgements.

Even if you ask her out too early, the girl you’re messaging will appreciate the fact you have the balls to at least pop the question.

Remember, she’s swiped right for you… which is a big enough indication in itself to know she likes you!

So now, all that’s left, is to spot the signs she’s comfortable enough with the idea of meeting up with you.

Here are some cues to look out for in the messages she sends you:

She’s Laughing, LOL’ing, and Partaking in the Banter

If you’re making her smile, laugh, and reply back positively, these are all massive green flags. Especially if she throws in some jokes and banter herself.

However, always pay close attention to the level of investment she puts into her messages.

If you find yourself doing all the leg work – asking questions, putting effort into composing witty replies…and she gives you nothing to work with – she doesn’t ask questions back, or simply replies with just ‘LOL’ or ‘Haha’.

Then it’s like prodding a lifeless corpse.

investment in a conversation with a girl on tinder

If that’s the case, her ‘LOLs’ and ‘Hahas’ can’t be taken as positive cues that she’s ready for a date.

Here’s an example of that:

example of a girl not invested in the conversation on tinder

When this happens, it’s best to burn these matches and move onto the next.

She’s Asking Questions

Take every question she asks as one small step to building rapport and one giant leap to destination date-land.

what to say to a girl on Tinder by looking for the signs

If your match is asking questions, you’ve safely passed the first test – her impression of you is positive – your pics, bio, and first messages.

Now she’s committed to the conversation and interested in getting to know you. Basically she’s sussing out if you’re date-worthy or not.

Remember the investment scale I mentioned… Always keep it in the back of your mind! If the girl is asking questions, she’s balls-deep invested.

Answer her questions, retain a playfulness with your responses, and if she reacts postively, you’re ready to unleash the date card!

The Conversation is Fast Paced and Flowing

If she’s replying quickly, she’s clearly enthusiastic, enjoying the conversation, and hoping it’ll lead to something.

The best time to ask a girl on a date or exchange numbers, is when you catch her in the right mood.

Strike whilst the irons hot. When she’s buzzed and the happy feeling is strong – it will be easy for her to say “Yes” to a date without giving it too much thought.

Because a girl’s decision to date you is never really based on logic, it’s based on how she FEELS in the moment.

So if she’s messaging fast and noticeably enjoying your chat, then there’s never a better time to pop the date question.

Don’t delay it. Her mood, along with her decision to date you or not, is likely to change if you ask at the wrong time.

The Bait Slip Test

If you’re unsure whether NOW is the right time to ask the girl out, you can opt to test the water first.

Plant the bait and see if you get a nibble.

signs a girl likes you on tinder

Casually slip the suggestion of a meetup into the conversation, but whilst doing so, follow up with something else as a distraction.

The idea of this tactic is to plant the idea of a date, but as a casual suggestion so it doesn’t force a commited response.

You then test her reply. Whether or not she takes the bait – replies to the casual date suggestion in a positive way or chooses to ignore it.

Here’s an example of the bait slip test in action:

bait slip test in action

The suggestion of a drink was slipped into the conversation. Notice how it doesn’t force a reply.

I then changed the subject back to more rapport building.

It takes the pressure off of her. She will have noticed the date text but can choose whether or not to reply to it, without the awkwardness of being put on the spot.

If she ignores the bait, and instead chooses to talk about what she does to ‘keep herself busy’, with no mention of the drink suggestion – this is your cue to wait it out a bit longer, she’s not comfortable with the idea of going on a date yet.

However, if she positively picks up on the fact you mentioned drinks, then it’s a green light!

Lock the date down!

How to Ask a Girl Out / Exchange Numbers on Tinder

When you feel like your matches’ interest is peaking, it’s time to move things off Tinder – get her number, FaceBook, or ultimately a meetup.

Lucky for you, because if you’ve picked up on any of the signals mentioned above, you’ll know she’s keen and ready to hand over her digits. The transition to getting a date will be as smooth as James Bond ordering a dry martini.

what to say to a girl on tinder james bond

But how you phrase the date text is VERY important…and there are a number of ways you can still screw up with this despite her giving you all the positive signs she wants to date you.

The Dating Message Don’ts:

First let’s cover how to message a girl on Tinder the wrong way. Here are things to avoid when asking a girl out:

The ‘I did not see that coming’ Date Invite

It’s always best to let the date suggestion flow from a fluid conversation. Whilst you’re texting her live – rapid back and forth messaging.

Don’t randomly message her out of the blue when there’s been gaping black hole from when the conversation was last active. We’re talking like 4+ hours of no coms. Always let it lead from a fast flowing conversation.

With this girl, I didn’t get back to her for 12 hours:

playing it too cool with a girl you message on tinder

The same goes for escalating too quick. If all you’ve got is a reply to your first message, don’t come in hot blooded and slap down the date invite!

You’ve gotta warm up your matches and get to know them first.

Placing the Power in Her Court

Avoid phrasing your date invite like any of the following:

“Do you want to get a drink sometime?”
“When are you free?” or “What time are you free?”
“Where you wanna meet for coffee?”
“Can I get your number?”

If you phrase your date texts like this, you’re just spoon feeding her the power. It’s now all on her terms. She can say YES or NO, or choose a night which might be inconvenient for you.

You’re effectively letting her wear the trousers from the get go.

When setting up the date, your match is looking for you to lead and be assertive. She wants you to be the man and make the decisions – choosing the venue, activities, and time of date.

Make it easy for her to say “YES”.

what to say to a girl on tinder by being dominant

Don’t give her the uneccessary stress of having to choose; a restaurant, a time to meet, or a night she’s free.

That’s your job.

Being too Available

“I’m free Mon–Fri nights, oh and Saturday and Sunday”

Never appear like you’re too available (even if you are). Otherwise your matches will assume your free time predominantly involves watching Netflix or playing World of Warcraft in your secret bunker.

Instead, you want to ‘fit her in’ to your busy schedule.

Women like a busy man. Someone who puts there life goals and work first, and dating second. Think – Tony Stark, and Bruce Wayne:

setting up the date with a girl on tinder

Here are some good examples of what to say to a girl on Tinder for arranging the time of the date:

“Im pretty busy this week, but should be free Thursday night”

“Let’s do next Wednesday if you’re free then, otherwise we’ll postpone to the following week.”

“I’m free either Tuesday night or Friday night. Pick wisely ;)”

In the next example, I was messaging this girl on a Monday night, and let her know I wasn’t available until Saturday earliest:

not being too available for a date on tinder

If your match isn’t available the night you suggest, try not to panic and backtrack by replying with “actually I’m also free Friday and Saturday too…”

Stick to your guns. If she wants to date you, she will make time for you. Wait it out and book her in next week instead.

The Dating Message Do’s:

Now for how to message a girl on Tinder the CORRECT way for setting up the date.

Be Dominant

The key ingredient for setting up the date is ‘dominance’. You need to take control of the situation – the time and location of the date should be all on YOUR terms.

Like we’ve already discussed. You want to be the one calling the shots – be assertive and lead like a man.

Take the stress out of organising the date, so it’s easy for her to say “Yes” to a meet up.

With this, it’s best to avoid phrasing the date suggestion as a question:

E.g: “Do you want to get a drink sometime?”

Instead, replace the question with a statement. You can do this using the word ‘LET’S’

Here’s an example:

using the word lets to get a date on tinder

Always assume she’s going to say “Yes” to a date. Be presumptuous. It’s attractive.

Once she replies with “Yes”, continue with your overly dominant behaviour for picking the time and venue!

E.g. “Cool, let’s meet 7pm at Charlie’s bar…
“we might even catch happy hour”

Or in this example of a Tinder match I transitioned over to Facebook:

tinder example on fb

Insinuating the Date

Similar to the bait slip test, insinuating the date is a great method to casually bring up the suggestion of a date without risking rejection.

You can do this by steering the conversation towards your intended end goal.

If the end goal is to take your match out for coffee, simply steer the conversation towards talking about coffee, cafes, or Starbucks.

Once on topic, let the date message naturally flow from the conversation about coffee:

“We should totally go Starbucks sometime, their new frappuccino selection is to die for”

Like the bait slip test, there is no specific time frame. You’re not trying to lock her in yet. Just casually suggesting how it might be cool.

Then you simply wait and test her reaction – if positive, you set up the date with dominance!

Now you’ve acquired a powerful set of skills for asking a girl out on Tinder, the last component to discuss is when to exchange numbers and move things off of Tinder.

Exchanging Numbers on Tinder

This is always a big question mark….

When do you ask for her number? – Do you get her number before asking her out? Or after asking her out? Or both at the same time?!

You’ll notice some of my message screenshots are on Whatsapp, and FB messenger.

That’s because I often get a matches’ number before asking a girl out.

The order you do this really depends on the situation. There’s no right or wrong way to do it.

I find the best tactic is to plant the idea of a date on Tinder, without setting anything in stone, and then proceed to ask for her digits.

Once you’ve moved over to whatsapp, IM messenger etc. you confirm the date and setup the logistics.

To be honest, if you’ve made it this far, and the girl has already said “YES” to a date, then it really doesn’t matter at what point you exchange numbers.

It’s situational. Some girls prefer keeping everything on Tinder, whereas some girls like to add you on Facebook first.

What if her Pictures Look a Little Misleading?

You know what I’m talking about…. 5 zoomed in face shots, a lot of makeup, and a heavy use of airbrushed Instagram / Snapchat filters.

If this is the case, adopt damage control!

Ask for her Facebook BEFORE setting up the date.

Do some background research to save yourself from a bad case of misrepresentation and a super awkward first date with a beached whale.

If her Facebook photos match up – she’s attractive enough in your eyes – then continue to setup the date.

Otherwise abort mission!

How to Ask for a Girl’s Number on Tinder

In terms of how you ask for her number, follow the same principles detailed above for how you ask for a date.

Be dominant, and assume she’ll hand her digits over like in this example:

exchanging numbers with a girl on tinder


xchanging fb with a girl on tinder

The Next Step

Now that you understand what to say to your matches on Tinder, you’re ready to discover the 8 magic messages to turn any Tinder match into a date, fuck buddy or girlfriend. This system is so powerful, thousands of guys are using it like clockwork to effortlessly get hookups.

So if you want to take full advantage of Tinder, Bumble, or any other dating App you’re currently using, you’ll want to watch this video before it’s taken down.

Click the image below to go to step two, the solution:

Wrapping it up

I hope you enjoyed my complete breakdown of what to say to a girl on Tinder – from the first message to how you get her out on a date!

It was incredibly fun putting this article together and fishing out some of my old Tinder examples. Together with a few extremely cringe examples, I like to think there are some golden nuggets in there too 😉

Hopefully you get a lot of value out of it, and use it to successfully tee up some dates with your matches.

If you feel like I’ve missed anything important, please pop a reply in the comments below. I’d love to hear any suggestions or tips currently working well for you on Tinder.

So there you have it… a 5000 word brain overload on what to say to a girl on Tinder! Now it’s time for you to get back to swiping and start putting your newfound techniques to practice!

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  1. Mate, you’re a friggin legend for putting this article together. Mad respect! 🤜🏼

  2. Bro… The bait thing… Golden! Thanks

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